filled.

it seems that i've nothing to blog about but many many photos to post and sad to say, blogger really suck in the aspect of photo uploads.

i'm sure that many would have agreed with me.

anyway,

de javu is all common to me now. everywhere i go, it's de javu, de javu. xan's birthday celebration. the court session & all that happen on thur. not stop combo of de javus. one after the other. strange isn't it?

people say that when such things happens, it means that you're seeing death, or something close to death and that something really evil and nafarious is gonna come upon you.

am i afraid?
or scared out of my wits?
nah. i've been listening to such stupid tales ever so recently. to a point that i'm numb to it.

death? is nothing to be afraid of. instead, all to rejoice of. it's a break free from everything. everything that's bonding you here.

i know, it is selfish for me to have such an egocentric thinking. it sets me thinking of how much disappointment and hurt i'll inflict to my family and friends and even God, giving up all that he's placed in me, if i just leave like that.

a vist to matt's school, made me realized that, my life, it's not just bout me and how i live it. but of my family and my friends too. the responsibility of matt's education and his welfare is not solely upon my parents but on me as well. as the eldest, i must learn to bear some of the load off my parents' shoulders.

many times,
i feel that life's crashing down on me. suffocating me.
but i know i cant and i wouldnt bow down to these obtacles.
cause what doesnt break you will make you strong.
i'm not gonna be a loser or someone who quits,
but someone who'll overcome the odds.
cause i know that
i'll always have a pillar to lie on. (:

on a happier note,

i really enjoyed all that happened on thurs. everything felt like we had go back to what we were 2years ago.

i'm grateful and thankful that i've such friends around me. (: